Young Poets Magazine –

"Learning to Squint" by Olivia Walters

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September 15th, 2026

Young Poets Magazine

Learning to Squint

by Olivia Walters

Ava’s gone
Not quite gone gone,
But head-gone –
Her mind that knows mine,
Squirming and rattling and twinkling
A million ground-up mindstars
crash
in gentle waves
with every shake of head.

And oh how she shakes!
vomiting in my parents’ bathroom –

12:35 AM.

Afraid of animals in her mind-that-knows-mine
Great glittering forest,
a wall of mirrors reflecting shadows,
caverns of sparkling darkness
she stares into too long,
getting lost alongside
the outlines of mindbeasts.

She’s there, I’m here,
8 years old –

12:35 AM.

And my room is cold,
her bed emptied –
a draft of gone-ness
with its hands around my throat.


Roombeasts jump out at me.
Yellow dog bookend,
how you metamorphose!
Mindbeast right in front of me
in night-light light.

Frozen –
loneliness with its frozen chain,
I do all I can.
I reach out in the dark –

Mindbeast unmoving.

I do all I can,
squint my eyes,
change the image if not
its presence.

Mindbeast’s a mirage.
I squint and it shivers,
becomes a flicker of gold
between ribs and wallpaper.
I confront it directly with my eyes,
hold it as hope in my pupil.

12:45 AM.

I am 8 years old.

Hoping for Ava,
I squint enough to dissect her head –
ephemeral memory of it –
split it open with my eyes,
rearranging its mirror-images and shadows
until the great forest inside
folds backward on either side of its spine,
just enough for her to peek through.

The mosaic dome of her sky tilts and parts,
a flicker of gold across the emptiness of no-sky –
I catch her
so she knows I’m there.

About the Poet
Olivia Walters resides in Bow, New Hampshire, United States.
Read the poet's biography and Young Poets World publications on Olivia Walters's Artist Page.

Young Poets Collection
This poem is also featured in Young Poets Collection #3, published in the Young Poets World Library.

Previously published in Young Poets Magazine:
I Will Let You Lead Me
by Nikolina Živković

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