Wax Mag #6 –

"I Didn't Mean To", poem by Shakira Harris

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Published January 15th, 2025

Poetry Contest #21 – First Place

I Didn't Mean To

by Shakira Harris

punishment, resentment, anger
the reactions to a 4-year-old's faults
I didn't mean to embarrass you mommy
but you filled my wounds with salt.

guilt tripping, gaslighting, manipulating
were what raised this not-so-little girl
I didn't mean to anger you mommy
but those things are what attract my attention and desires in the real world.

fear of rejection, trust, love
the result of maternal affection that was withheld
I didn't mean to irritate you mommy
but it clearly didn't matter what I felt.

humour, rebellion, vices
an inevitable part on my journey through life
I didn't mean to disappoint you mommy
but your reaction wouldn't have differed, even if my actions were right.

begging, explaining, hoping
efforts I put in so we could attempt to connect
I didn't mean to disturb you mommy
but my mistakes aren't something you forget.

independent, resilient, self sufficient
the affirming words that continuously shaped me
I didn't mean to outshine you mommy
but it wasn't like you were actually listening.


About the Poet
Shakira Harris resides in Cape Town, Western Cape, South Africa.
Read the poet's biography on Shakira Harris's Artist Page.

Next in Wax Mag #6:
Poem 24
Poem by Grace Arnold

Back to Wax Mag #6

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